The Hand of God

This is what Argentina needed today to win against Germany when Pekerman made some awful substitutions early in the game.

Messi and Saviola did not start. What!?
Then Abbondanzieri gets injured and has to sub out at a crucial time in the match. And then they sub out Riquelme?????? WHAT ARE YOU THINKING!!!!!!

I had Argentina going all the way this year. ALL. THE. WAY.
I wouldn't have made this prediction if I knew their manager was a complete loon. Why do you sub out Riquelme when there's still 20 minutes and Ballack, Podolski, and Klose are still on the pitch?
I bet you feel like a real ass when minutes later, Klose equalizes.

And now you have to play extra time without your A game.

And now you are pitting Jens Lehman against your second goalkeeper? No contest. I knew what was going to happen when I saw your substitutions. I just knew it.

Way to go Pekerman. You blew it.

Breaking the Law!

Yes, he made a conscious decision not to get a license this year. Yes, it was a Sunday night. Yes, I was with him, of all days. So of course we got caught for fishing without a license. It was our fault and we admit it. But we've learned our lesson (a costly decision at $112 each), that even though a park ranger has never actually been seen monitoring the park in your entire life, you will get caught on the day you don't have one.

They're Dropping Like Flies

This past weekend, I attended one of Joe's cousin's wedding. Ryan was the last of the Metzger grandkids that was to get married in the family. Excuse me, SECOND to last. The last would be us. And boy did we know it. Every aunt and uncle made it a point to tell us that we were next to be married. Oy vey!

Patience, people! I promise your patience will be rewarded.

Let the Bounties Begin!!

I always liked international sports competition. I love the idea of pitting nation against nation in a non political way. Y'know? Love the Olympics. I remember cutting pieces of paper and sharpening my crayons to make flags of the countries that marched in the opening ceremonies.

And so too do I feel excitement when the World Cup comes around. I get all jittery when a country's hopes and dreams come down to one penalty kick. And all the pressure that kicker has on his shoulders can be unbearable, to the point where I feel bad for the guy that misses it. You know deep down in your heart that not only did he lose the game for the team, he also lost the game for a whole country.

And that's where the world talley of bounties rises. Let's face it, players have mysteriously died after losing games. And somewhere in a dark alley, bounty killers are making a buck. No one in the neighborhood wants to give up information on someone's offing. Noooo way.

I'll be keeping tabs on the South American teams during this competition. And keeping my fingers crossed that none of their games will have to come to a sudden death shoot out. Because it could indeed be sudden death for them, one way or another.

Movie Review: Everything Is Illuminated

Straight off the bat, I'm giving this movie 5 eggrolls out of 5. This movie is totally premium and does not have the shit between its ears.

Jonathan (Elijah Wood) is a young Jewish man on a journey to Ukraine in search of a lady he does not know about. With the help of a dodgy translator, Alex, his blind grandfather, also named Alex, and his seeing eye bitch, Jonathan finds how his grandfather was saved from Nazi invaders.

Although Elijah Wood is actually credited as the lead in the movie, I have to say that the main character to me is actually Alex, the translator. Played by Eugene Hutz (who is also the lead singer of gypsy punk band Gogol Bordello), Alex is a city kid with swagger. He likes American music and clothing, but his stodgy English can be attributed to Roget's thesaurus. He's also the narrator throughout the movie and while Jonathan is on a journey to find the lady that saved his grandfather, Alex makes some discoveries for himself.

This one packs comedy and drama all into one neat little package without seeming forced. Probably the only movie I can sit through that has strong Jewish/ Nazi themes. I highly recommend it and by the way, the movie is based on a novel by Jonathan Safran Foer (the "main character") and is the directorial debut of fellow actor Liev Schreiber (Scream, Manchurian Candidate, The Omen).

On a side note, Eugene Hutz was initially casted because he was Ukrainian but was able to finagle his band into a cameo. Russian folk music (which is quite fun to listen to) is laced throughout.

York County Has Pirates. Sort Of.

For realz, I saw a guy get into his car today. But the funny part is that he had an eye patch. Like, he wasn't trying to be a pirate. He really had an eye patch. Really.

I was thinking to myself as I watched him from my rear view mirror, "Really? You're going to drive that car? With one eye? Wow."

Language of Origin and Root Words

I will admit right up front that I would have been knocked out of the very early rounds of this year's national spelling bee. They aren't what they use to be back when I was in grade school. Nowadays, spelling bees are heavy on the medical jargon and foreign words adapted into the English language. Take for example the winning word and the 2nd place word: ursprache and weltschmerz. Both German words that have no English equivalents. I mean, they would have never done that 15 years ago. Words that I had to spell seem elementary compared. One time I actually won on the word "generosity". Way too easy compared to these spelling superheroes.

The passively competitive edge in me really wants to read up on some difficult words so I can feel like an 8th grader again.