Open Cover Letter to Stephen Hawking

Dear Dr. Hawking:

I am responding to the posted open position as your assistant. I realize that you are looking for a graduate student to help you with your travels, studies, lectures and other tasks and I am willing to do all that. I know that the job will requre a lot of physical activity and I've been working out at the gym, so I'm fit to push your wheelchair anywhere. Yes it's true that I have little knowledge in quantum physics, singularity in time-space and black hole mechanics but I can assure you that I can learn pretty quickly. I'm pretty good at math, passed both high school and college calculus. I wasn't so good in physics but I think a second stab at it would prove better results.

You see, Dr. Hawking, you are one of my top ten...nay, top five heroes of all time. And I would be most honored to intern as your assistant for 2 years. My favorite is that time when you looked at the warp core prop on the set of Star Trek and said, "I'm working on that". Although silly, I really believe you could do it if you wanted.

I can send you my resume under separate cover if you think I'm qualified. I just have to make some changes to it so it presents my math skills nicer. I'm looking forward to your call.

Sincerely,
Sophalopalus